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Op-ed: Get on the right bus (by Peter Children)

How do we get to the promised land? You just need to get on the right bus. Let me warn you its not cheap. The fare runs into the thousands and you need to pay for it over a lifetime; are you interested? Oh, one more slight thing….there is no guarantee you will reach your scheduled destination. Now do you still want to sign up for this tour?

You sound interested; then to sign up for this trip you can go to any religious facility that offers eternal life. In there they have some one who will explain everything you want to know; there will be no printed brochures but they should be able to instill a visual image in your mind with little trouble. Much of that will depend on your I.Q. Because this gives new meaning to that “dream trip” you have planned for. You won’t be alone, trust me there will a lot of fellow passengers and the buses will be crowed.

You won’t need a lot of luggage or even toiletries, just one outfit will do. In fact all your needs will be provided during your stay in the promised land; room and board food and beverages…anything you want is all included in the price of your ticket. Did I mention a lot of your friends who themselves took an earlier bus will be there to meet you, they’ll show you what to do and give you directions.

Some of these religious facilities have huge overhead what with all the stain glass windows that need constant cleaning and of course high utilities bills mainly because of those 50 foot high ceilings. You know what Allient charges…its not cheap. There are however other benefits like all night buffets and Frank Sinatra concerts are free.

I don’t want to sound commercial, but I am a licensed tour broker with low overhead and I can offer you those same tickets at half what those brick & mortar churches can. My bus is just as comfortable and leaves on the hour promptly. Just send your ticket payments to me in care of this site and I’ll see to it you’ll get a good seat right up front….. Why pay more. Did I mention, we are authorized to accept all major credit cards?

Peter Children

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