(Submitted to NorthIowaToday.com by Mary J. Witherall)
I was recently presenting in a workshop for women about leading a life with focus and purpose and why that is so important. We were sharing how moments in our life has just flown by almost in a blink of an eye and now find ourselves wondering where that time went. It was common for many of the women to say, wow, my children are grown up now where did the time go, I wish I could enjoy those moments again but with more present awareness and joy in my heart. Still others shared finally my children are grown and now I can focus on me and my life. Some said, I can’t wait to retire or if I could just retire now and live the life I dream about then my life would be perfect and happy.
I hear these comments often in my work with women. It seems to be a common trend for many of us to feel or desire something different in our lives than what we actually have experienced or have right now in this moment.
We tend to lead a full and busy life tending to everyday tasks and chores that are generally mundane and tedious but don’t give us that fulfilled feeling or sense of joy.
It is true that our lives tend to be full and busy with everyday things that we sometimes get caught up with the daily tasks of life and forget what is important or what is it that we want in our lives. In addition, we don’t enjoy the moments that are presented to us each day because our attention is so focused on completing tasks and just getting through the day and not having the awareness or perspective that life is good just as it is. In fact, for many people it takes every bit of energy and attention to just get through the day and as a result feel exhausted by the day’s end. For many, our lives are consumed with taking care of the children and all the family and household needs, going to work or school and fulfilling the tasks of the job, worrying about money and how to pay all the bills and meeting the needs of others in our life that by the end of the day and week there is no time or energy left. I recently asked a woman if she was interested in having more balance in her life and her response was that I am too busy to have balance.
Now this comment made me chuckle but in reality it is sad and it is the reality of many women and men as well, with their lifestyle they lead. The fact is that if we don’t pay attention to how we lead our lives and the impact it has on our health and happiness symptoms of dis-ease begins to show up in our life. Diseases and symptoms are not really the problem. They are actually the body-mind-spirit’s attempt to solve a problemñ they are a message from the subconscious to the conscious in essence saying take notice ñ pay attention, there is an imbalance in your life.
So you may respond well that is my life and I’m stuck with it like it or not. But wouldn’t it be wonderful to experience present moment joy and fulfillment…to have that balance, energy, purpose and success that we seem to only dream and desire but never experience in a present-day life. Is it possible to achieve that…what would I need to do … what do I need to think or feel… what actions would I need to take to experience the joy, balance and present moment living that would give me sense of living well with focus and purpose.
The first thing I would tell you if you came to me with these questions and desire is to focus on what you want and be specific. Many times we never really take the time to really look at what we want. What we generally do is focus on what we don’t want and then proceed in attracting that into our lives. How that happens is another Finding Your Way story in itself for another time. So my suggestion to begin this process is to take a piece of regular size paper and make two columns with titles of what I don’t want and what I do want and then as you write down things in the what I don’t want counter it with what you do want. Let your imagination go wild from personal to work related to childhood dreams. See what you come with and then prioritize the top three things that you really do want that are important to you right now.
This is just a beginning so tune in next time for more Finding Your Way.
Mary J. Witherall, Director of the Focus Living Center in Mason City, Iowa. Mary is a Lifestyle Coach & Consultant specializing in helping women to live a full and well life with focus and purpose.
Focus Living Center offers programs and services for personal and professional growth.|